News with a humourous edge
Saying racist things not racist, insist racists
16 September 2025 @ 10:15 am
Racists have claimed that making unashamedly racist statements is definitely not racist, and anyone who accuses them of being racist is a racist.Genocide is always bad, unless we’re the ones doing it, insists Israel
16 September 2025 @ 8:48 am
As the UN declared that Israel has committed genocide in Gaza, Israel has moved to remind the international community that the most despicable acts in human history must never be repeated, except under certain permissive circumstances.Keir Starmer denies slow response times whilst praying for safe rescue of the Chilean miners
16 September 2025 @ 6:44 am
Keir Starmer has hit back at critics accusing him of slow response times, whilst taking the time to hope for the safe return of the trapped Chilean miners.MP nobody has heard of leaves party nobody cares about for party nobody likes
15 September 2025 @ 11:34 am
Westminster was today rocked to its very core after Danny Kruger, a man previously only known to his family WhatsApp group, dramatically defected from the Conservatives to Reform UK.Donald Trump and Prince Andrew agree to pretend not to know each other during this week’s state visit
15 September 2025 @ 9:12 am
Donald Trump and Prince Andrew have mutually agreed to pretend not to know each other during the US President’s upcoming state visit to the UK.One-day time management course could easily have been taught in one hour
15 September 2025 @ 8:23 am
The recently completed full-day training course on Effective Time Management could easily have been taught in an hour, according to the attendees this afternoon.Brave patriots highlight their desire to unite the kingdom by hurling glass bottles at policemen
14 September 2025 @ 8:18 am
Lovers of this country have gathered in London to express their patriotism using their preferred communication medium of mindless thuggery and violence.Man claiming to be a ‘classical liberal’ actually just a bit racist
12 September 2025 @ 10:47 am
In a stunning turn of events, a man claiming to be a follower of “Western Liberalism” is not an impish provocateur desiring to keep people and markets free of state interference, but rather a somewhat ignorant man with a bizarre hostility towards dark-skinned people.Tommy Robinson rally to focus heavily on religious organisation where 20% of all kids were abused
12 September 2025 @ 9:29 am
Tommy Ten Names, the exposer of religious groups where children have been groomed and abused has told followers that tomorrow's rally will focus heavily on the religious organisation that abused 20% off all the children associated with it.King Charles duped into tea with Prince Harry after believing he’d be meeting Paddington Bear
11 September 2025 @ 12:50 pm
Palace insiders report that King Charles endured the most disappointing teatime since the cucumber sandwiches ran out at Sandringham in 1987, after being tricked into meeting Prince Harry while under the impression he would be hosting Paddington Bear.