News with a humourous edge
Men enjoying day of pampering as reward for successful ejaculation
15 June 2025 @ 4:06 pm
Men across the country are enjoying a day of being pampered as a reward for a successful ejaculation they experienced many years ago.Serial draft dodger demands huge military parade in his honour
14 June 2025 @ 10:34 am
A man who gained five military deferments has demanded that people who actually joined the military march in his honour.Man dies horrible, violent death after failing to read Friday 13th NewsThump article
13 June 2025 @ 1:29 pm
A man has met a dreadful, gory demise after he failed to read a NewsThump article which allowed site visitors to avoid a terrible curse.Another f**king horrendous thing
13 June 2025 @ 10:42 am
Reports are emerging of another f**king horrendous thing.Israel launches wave of missile strikes against man who looked at it funny in pub
13 June 2025 @ 8:49 am
Israel has launched a huge wave of missile strikes against a man who looked at it funny in the pub.“It was a Roman salute” insists former comedian David Walliams
13 June 2025 @ 5:46 am
David Walliams has hit back at his critics today, insisting that his Nazi salutes during a recording of ‘Would I Lie to You?’ were in fact just Roman salutes.Man wearing shorts realises how much urine routinely splashes over his legs
12 June 2025 @ 9:48 am
A man who donned a pair of shorts due to the warmer weather this week has realised with horror just how much pee splatters up from the urinal onto his legs during a normal toilet visit.Brave free-speech enthusiast reacting to pride flag in shop window like a vampire confronted with a cross
12 June 2025 @ 9:29 am
A man who bravely insists that free speech is the most fundamental aspect of any society, is today reacting like a vampire confronted by a cross whenever he sees a pride flag.“We are going for growth,” says Rachel Reeves, “Oh no we’re not,” says economy
12 June 2025 @ 8:17 am
After Rachel Reeves spent yesterday telling the nation her spending review was positioning the country for growth, the economy leapt out from behind a curtain to remind everyone this morning that "Oh no it isn't!"How to be suitably enraged by trans issues – an idiot’s ten-point guide to joining the front lines of the culture war
11 June 2025 @ 11:05 am
Are you desperate to join the front lines of the culture war, but struggle to know what you should be angry about, and for what reason? Or are you irrationally angry at some things but need a better way to articulate your reasoning to the woke brigade who are obviously to blame? Then THIS guide is for you.